Feb 8, 2010

Have A New Kid By Friday

I am reading a great book called Have a New Kid by Friday: How to Change Your Child's Attitude, Behavior & Character in 5 DaysHave a new kids by friday, parenting books by Kevin Leman.

I always thought that I would never have a kid that thinks he runs the show.
I always new that I did not want to parent my kids the way my parents did.

Growing up we always ran the show and we did pretty much whatever we wanted, we still had rules and such but mostly got our way. As a result of that which I have come to know as permissive parenting my younger sister and I resorted to rebellion and lack of respect for our parents or little of it.

Now I have two boys and WOW! It is not as easy as I thought, the good thing is I am not as permissive as my parents were. Reading the book however I now know that I am a permissive/authoritarian parent which is not good either and the reason why I need to read this book in the first place lol!

Here are some of the things I am learning in this book so far and you will learn too.

I learning in this book that it is not OK to ask kids questions this leads to defensive behavior instead only ask open-ended statements.

And always say "tell me more about that" instead of "why would you like/do that", "that song is stupid" or "that is silly". Instead be interested in what your kids like and join in and have a relationship with your kids.

If you don't like something your kid does say something like "I don't think it is for me personally but I would like you to tell me more about it, it sounds interesting", and actually have a conversation with the your kids.

Something I need to work on is, it is OK to disagree but not OK to be critical, argumentative, confrontational and I think that is key.

He says you want to be a authoritative parent not authoritarian parent or permissive. Both permissive and authoritarian parents are only setting kids up for rebellion.

He explains all that in the book and how to know what type of parent you are.

Anyway just what I am learning in the book Have a New Kid by Friday and it applies to us all and is just good info on how to get along with others.

This is a great book so far I started it on Sunday, I have read three chapters and look forward to tomorrow to read another.

I will do another post about this book later thanks for reading.

To Your Families Success!



Hilary Melton-Butcher said...

Hi Joanne .. it's engaging with people isn't it - finding out more and learning more .. while at the same time staying within the boundaries. Not always easy with boisterous kids .. go well - Hilary

lifeisagift said...

Thanks for the comment. I love to learn especially when I am in need of the info. I especially love self help and nonefiction.

My six year old wants to be the boss and he is very strong willed and hard headed.

I wish you well!